Your photos? Photos! Pix! Pix! Kodachrome! Polaroid!  Sooner the better! February 24, 2020
Send 'em, send ‘em, send’ em, send ‘em, send 'em, please!


Please send 

All your photos 

Right to the SPOON

Do it right now, see?

Before they’re eaten

By Rocky Raccoon! 

You can send portraits, 

Baby pictures, school dealies, 

Vacation candids, 

Passport pix, too,

Armed services snapshots, 

Employment ID, photos when

You worked at a gas station, 

Model Market, any lot to park it!

Library, or a sweet young 

Women’s wear store, 

Bullock’s with the shorts

For svelte young buttocks!

Dive bar, hospital, dude ranch, 

Chaffey Junior college, 

Arroyo Seco, 

Why not ask my old bud,

Steve Pacheco?

FotoMat, drive-in the-ATE’r, 

Hobbies store, 

Veterinarian’s office, 

Lifeguard station,

Feeding your neighbor’s 

Poodle Ken’l Ration, 

As a security guard, 

Medical resident, hey! 

Bride or groom, 

Bridesmaid or groom’s dude,

How ‘bout Psych Aide 

At a Ho-Ho Hotel?

When you were 

Hos-pi-tal-iz-ed with a 

Fractured collar bone 

From drivin’ on the phone! 

Airplane, confirmation, 

Bar mitzvah, bas, too

In the court house, 

Pizza parlor, tending bees, 

Making goat cheese,

As a daring young Lancer 

On the flying trapeze!

Keepin’ carrier pigeons! 

With your lil dachshund, 

“Miss Roxanne!”

Cocker spaniel, 

German shepherd, 

Airedale, why not?

Your elderly tortoise, 

Tropical fish, shy piranha,

Pony your aunt bought

From Lillian Gish!

At the Eiffel Tower, 

Coit Tower, yeah!

Tower Records at 3 AM, 

County Records, 

Downtown, Uptown, 

All around the town, 

Las Palmas is up

And Houston is down!

Fall out shelter, underground, 

Ultrasound on a passenger train, 

On the A Train, on BART, 

Wall Street, South Street, 

On 45th Street, 

Down on 103rd, 

Hovering on Hoover, 

Whipping along Westwood, 

Pipin’ on Pico, 

Wailin’ on Wilshire,

Sliding down Slauson! 

Moon-walkin’ on Whittier!

Trucking down Telegraph, 

Up on Sunset with Cher!

At a family picnic, 

Dads playing Horseshoes, 

At the river, on Balboa, 

On 15th Street, 

Wherever the 

Peppermint Twisters meet! 

In Lonesome Town, 

In the Town Without Pity, 

Where the Boys Are, 

Walking On The Wild Side,

Right down to the nitty gritty!

When your mom took you 

And your brothers shopping, 

Your first haircut at Prather’s!

Tweet tweet elite Back Street, 

In the Valley of 

The Jolly Green Giant! 

On Gasoline Alley, 

With your gear-head buds! 

With the boy you went 

Steady with for a week 

In 3rd grade! 

In Will Wright’s!

Mario’s, Chart House,

Bratskellar also!

La Jolla Cove, in a cabana, 

At the Paradox, 

Dancing on “Lloyd Thaxton”, 

Mowing your parents’s lawn, 


Paper route, 

Powdering your nose, 

Swimming underwater, 

Doing the Swim, 

With your ex-friend Jim, 

Under the Boardwalk, 

At the Nu-Pike, at P.O.P., 

At Marine Land, Ocean Park!

On Olvera Street, up in Redlands, 

Out at Twenty-Nine Palms, 

Under the weather, 

Off your feed, 

Feelin all right, not feelin 

Too good yourself, 

One Summer Night, 

Your first glass of champagne, 

The one and only time 

You ever drank rum, 

Playing a snare drum, 

Chewing Beeman’s Gum, 

With ya dormies at Lum’s, 

Needin a Tums, 

When you had the mumps,

Down in the dumps, 

Walking in the Rain, 

Pictures of you at 

Fillmore West, 

Hanging out with 

Miss Nedra West, 

Hiking at Big Sur,  

Imitating Raymond Burr, 

So fine, so fine,

Dorothy Provine!

Got a picture? 


You cramming in 

Doheny Library, 

Jammin’ in Trojan Barrel, 

Galloping over the prairie, 

Chasing Miss Rosemary.

Licking a Ben & Jerry’s, 

Acting contrary, Larry!

Paying your bills, 

Eliminating frills, 

Listening to

Mr. Elmer Dill, 

Starting on The Pill, 

Making out your will, 

Chilling with Andy Sills, 

Taking the fall, 

Dribbling the ball, 

Swimming the Crawl, 

Meeting Arlene Dahl, 

Lauren Bacall,

Lucille Ball,

Don’t forget

Mr. Lou Rawls! 

Sailing in your yawl, 

Tripping and sprawling, 


With Andy Fall, 

A-kissin’ at the Fox, 

Jitters at Teen Center!

Droppin’ nickels 

In the jukebox, 

Climbing the Rosecrans rocks, 

Laundering your jock! 

Seeing a doc, picking a lock, 

Reading Dr. Spock, 

Wearing purple Crocs, 

Joining Tick Tockers, 

Got your British Walkers, 

Going out with a fast-talker, 

Pantsing Clint Walker!  

Slamming your locker, 

Holy Mackerel! 

Emailing a photo of you 

At the San Diego Zoo, 

Posing with a chimp, 

Dating a wimp, 

You better not smoke hemp! 

Filling in as a temp! 

Catching a spiral from 

Jack Kemp! 

Trying on lipstick 

At I. Magnin, 

Shopping for girdles 

At J. C. Penney 

Party at Layne Myrdall’s, 

Running the high hurdles, 

Making a shake that curdles, 

Buying Macadamia nuts

At Jurgensen's, 

Tryna get a word in, 

Feeling nauseous 

On the Matterhorn, 

Droppin Certs 

Off the Sky Line, 

Smoochin' on 

Tom Sawyer’s Island, 


It’s A Small World 

After All, 

Trying on school clothes 

At Robert Hall! 

Panning for gold at Knott’s, 

Sleeping on U.S. Army cots, 

Speeding in an Edsel, 

Admiring Crystal Bledsoe, 

Strolling on Penny Lane, 

Clothes-lined by 

Night Train Lane, 

Polishing a gear-shift knob 

At the Boys Club, 

Feeling so much better with 

Vick’s Vapo-Rub, 

Surfin’ Rincon 

With Jeff Kane, 

Topping it off with 


High octane, 


“Queen Jane


Staggering home intoxicantly, 

Flunking your DMV test, 

Sky-diving with Clayton Best, 

Filling a cedar hope chest!

You know the rest!

Alex’s Tamales 

At the school canteen, 

Living way way way

Beyond your means, 

Copying answers 

From Andrea Demes, 

Loosening the bolts under 

Coach Payne’s chair, 

Dozing in the jungle 

Where the lions roar, 

Wishing you could meet 

Diana Dors, 

Never ever stopping

On the 13th floor! 

Cruising down the middle 

Of a two-way street, 

Wondering who is really 

In the driver’s seat, 

Goin' ta see a girl 

On Lakeside Drive, 

She make a man

Break out in hives!

She wears her hair 

In a sky-high bouffant, 

You hear the sound 

Of a grandfather clock!

Her dad blocks you 

In the asphalt driveway, says 

“Sonny, you better keep away!”

Licking your wounds 

Down at Hillside next, 

Worrying about your next 

Algebra 2 test! 

Gobble down a Patty Melt 

With extra Hunt Ketchup, 

Park guide shows up 

From Hetch Hetchy —,

You bum a ride from 

Joe O’Malley on Hill,

Donna Baker lives 

Up a ways

You got 

No more chance

Than a pink penguin in beige!

Miss Avril Ford 

Charges room and board

To the Rolling Stones!

She makes waffles for Keith,

But Mick is beneath

Her contempt ‘cause

He said Nicolas girls

Was all skuzzes!

She popped him one, 

Miss Avril sure did!

Better call him 

Limpin’ Jagger!

That girl took 

His swagger!

Gettin’ a D 

In Health Education, 

Mama always said 

You lacked Patience! 

No chance at all a Lancelle 

Will go out with you, 

Boone’s Farm Strawberry 

To drown your blues!

Picture, picture, picture

From you!

Gotta see your face

No long-range views!

Said it before

Said it again

You don’t need persuadin’

From Rin Tin Tin!

Gotta have your photos

Gotta gotta gotta gotta

Inna gadda da vida!

Shimmy shimmy koko bop!

Hope this message reaches

Miss Tamia Hope!

I’m down on my knees

Beggin’ you please

Polaroids, Polaroids

Mac PhotoBooth

Do it right now!

Don’t wait another minute

The SPOON you’ll be in it!

‘Cause whether you play 

Checkers in C’ Del Mar,

Sidle up to the soy milk bar!

Mix turpentine

In Irvine,

Let me beseech you

In Laguna Beach, you!

Out in Texas where 

The hot bullets fly!

Way down in Arkansas

Where the vultures fly high!

Don’t matter!

Pancake batter!

Need em need em

Need em right now!

Out in Missouri

Without a doubt,

Send jpg files,

Twist and Shout!

If you live in the Rockies,

Don’t you get cocky!

I’ll get Marsha McClan 

After you, son!

Find your mom’s 


Raid them suckers!

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